Thanks, Harvard! Much as you drove me crazy, I had the time of my life today.

O.M.G.

Here’s an idea…stop pissing while you send text messages, as that very often leads to you dropping your phone into the toilet! Stop getting wasted and leaving your phone on top of your car and then driving away. STOP LOSING YOUR FUCKIN PHONE AHHHHHH I HATE YOU.

For the record, I don’t hate everyone who loses their phone, because sometimes you actually do just lose your phone. But I feel like 95% of these groups are created because someone lost their phone in an asinine way, and that’s what makes these groups (which seemed to be all the rage in like 2007 and have recently made a resurgence…contracts expiring?) so peeving.

I’ve decided that my blog posts in general are going to become much more brief in nature.

As of late, I’ve been a little bit MIA from posting on me@harvard. You probably saw that there was no Friday Five this week (there probably won’t be one this coming week), and there also won’t be a Pet Peeve Tuesday on the 2nd. That little countdown clock on the right should be indicative of why. I’ve just been so swamped lately with preparing for graduation that I haven’t been able to dedicate as much time as I would have liked to the blog. I promise I’ll get back into form once graduation is over.

Thanks for hanging in there!

The “literal music videos” (particularly “Total Eclipse of the Heart”, which is my current favorite), are pretty freaking hilarious. Viz:

When I turned 17, I was finally able to see an R-rated movie without fear of being thrown out. This may seem unimportant…but it is the only major thing that hinges on being 17. (Oh, actually, you can give blood…but…whoops…can’t do that anymore!) I was also allowed to legally drive with passengers in the car who weren’t my family (thanks Massachusetts!)

When I turned 18, I was an adult. The government compelled me to register for the Selective Service, and I was able to finally buy those things off the TV that say you “must be 18 to order”. I could VOTE. It was huge.

When I turned 19, it was my last year being a teenager. So yeah, it was important.

When I turned 20, I wasn’t a teenager anymore. See my 19th birthday.

When I turned 21, it was the pinnacle of awesome birthdays. I could drink! Legally! It’s what everyone waits forever for (or maybe I’m just an alcoholic?). I also had to renew my license and get a “horizontal” one so when I got carded it wouldn’t be with a juvenile license. I also had to take a new picture, and the one from my 16th birthday was MUCH better.

Tomorrow — May 27, 2009 — is my 22nd birthday. And as I just outlined above, it’ll be the first birthday in seven years that is practically pointless. Typically, I get wicked excited about my birthday. I let people know that my birthday is coming up for several months in advance. But this time I haven’t done that. And I don’t know if it’s because my graduation clock has been the focus of my mind, but it might just be because I don’t actually want to turn 22? What do I gain from it? Like Edwin Starr’s “War”, the answer to that question is “absolutely nothing” (say it again now!)

22 is a pointless age. All that happens to you is you get older. It’s the same with every age from here on out, I just realized…and now I’m not looking forward to it as much…

Chocolate Banana Toasted Almond

This is my drink for relaxing at home and ordering something. Technically a Chocolate Toasted Almond contains amaretto, kahlua, chocolate syrup, and milk. So I guess what I drink, substituting the chocolate syrup for banana liqueur, isn’t really a CTA, but it’s still pretty delicious. I’ll typically drink one of these when it’s late at night, say 1:00AM, and I need something that is both cooling and warming at the same time. That’s right, it’s like an alcoholic Icy-Hot patch or something. Definitely the best drink for a quiet night in central Massachusetts.

Long Island Iced Tea

This is the “I’m feeling like getting smashed” drink for me…because I totally underestimate how drunk I’m going to get when I drink one of these, and then it hits me like a ton of bricks. When I’m at any chain restaurant besides TGI Friday’s (see below), I’ll order myself a Long Island Iced Tea and let my troubles sail away. They are so alcoholic, but so delicious at the same time…you can’t even tell that your blood alcohol level is rising astronomically as you repeatedly take swigs…and that’s what makes a good drink a great drink.

Mai-Tai

The day after I turned 21, my friend Sam wanted to take me out for a little bite to eat. We went to this sleazy/awesome Chinese food restaurant in Harvard Square, called the Hong Kong (“the Kong”), and despite the fact that it was like just before noon on a Wednesday, I remember proudly showing my ID to the waitress and ordering myself a mai tai. Now, unless I’m having a scorpion bowl (isn’t that just a glorified mai tai?), whenever I feel the urge to booze at a Chinese food restaurant, the Mai Tai is the drink of choice.

Mojito

The classic drink for a hot day, I love me a good mojito. I typically order these (and I have no idea why) when I go to TGI Friday’s, and pretty much order them no place else. I don’t know what to say, they make them well there I guess…and I think that might have been the place that I had my first one. I always order them (again, probably because this is all I order at Friday’s) with a spicy chicken plate, because that muddled minty goodness is refreshing right after a tangy bite.

Seven & 7

On one of our first dates, Eric took me to a restaurant called the 111 Chop House. It’s a really classy steakhouse in Worcester (and when I go there I actually NEVER order steak, but rather this spinach stuffed haddock mmmmmm), and it has a great atmosphere. And almost universally when I go there, I order a Seven & 7 (Seagram’s 7 Whiskey and 7-Up). At the Chop, they make it really, really strong–strong enough that when my delicious chocolate and caramel bread pudding comes for dessert, the buzz is just on its way out. Delicious.

Got a favorite in this list? Vote for it below. Got another drink that you like better? Leave me a comment!